Global warming killed my father, then raped my mother

It seems like every day more and more stories surface about global warming. So far it has been claimed that global warming will kill off the polar bears, cause a thousand more Hurricane Katrina's, and give us all hepatitis.

Well now brothel owners in Bulgaria are claiming that is has hurt their business.

According to the spokesman for the pimps, whore mongers, and Democrats, all their "elite" girls are off working in the ski resorts because of global warming. They claim that the lack of snow means tourists have to find other ways to enjoy themselves.

Wow, so the choice is that stark. Apparently, the next best thing to shooting down the slopes dressed like a tool is sexually abusing poor Eastern European women.

The brothel owners claims they are being forced to use "temps" to take up the slack. Wait a minute, there are temp agencies for hookers? Where was I when this happened?