Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Happy Birthday Mr. Vice-President

Happy Birthday Dick Cheney!!!

It is times like this that make me reflect on why Dick Cheney is the greatest human being ever to live.

It is because all of these are true:

All tsunamis can be linked to Dick Cheney eating Indian food.

His favorite color is Fear.

The Chinese calendar includes a "Year of the Dick Cheney." Its symbol is Dick Cheney eating the last known Dodo bird.

He has three testicles and they are all registered to vote.

Dick Cheney's favorite childhood toy was the skull of Che Gueverra

While in Africa he ate an entire herd of elephants then gave everyone in the Congo AIDS.

His elementary school talent show act involved him waterboarding a Kindergartener. He got first place and the Presidential Medal of Freedom.

He invented the telegram and used it to send threatening messages to President Lincoln.

He once shanked the Prime minister of Ireland.

He can eat coal and crap Neil Diamond.

All Roadrunner cartoons are loosely based on his experiences as a child star.

Saturday, January 13, 2007

Perfect Americans vs. Mindless barbarians

VDH has another great column

He makes a good point about how the rest of the world seems to suffer from a sort of schizophrenia.

We hear it all the time: The rich US should get involved/the imperialistic US should stay out of everyone else's business.

There really is not a principled opposition to the US out there.

The liberals are right about one thing, we are hated for what we have done in the past. We are hated by the socialists because it is the rich, free, capitalistic America that felled their Russian experiment and calls into question their surety in the class war and the triumph of the proletariat. The Islamists hate us because we stand athwart the road of the future, barring the victory of Muhammad and declaring that the people of the planet deserve the right to choose their own destiny.

Our very existence mocks them. Here in the US the workers care not for class struggle or for socialism. American workers would rather have a red sports car than a red scarf tied around their neck.

Our large open society demands that one treat others the same, while the Islamist want to enslave others to their will and to their primitive religion.

Yet, I fear that the barbarians are winning. We are no longer sure of ourselves. We demand perfection of ourselves and our government, while our media and elites gloss over the savage behavior of our enemies.

Cruel mass murders are called "agrarian reformers" and grace the glossy covers of Time magazine while Americans who pray on their knees every night and love their neighbors are called a threat.

Islamists who behead reporters, suicide bomb, and bully the West are called "freedom fighters" and are treated as equals.

The world is a sad place. We are truly in an age where good is called evil and evil is called good.

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Live, Laugh, Love

Folks, sometimes you just need to laugh.

Therefore, I present you with hornymanatee.com

Monday, January 01, 2007

NY Times mourns their favorite Dictator

The NY Times is falling all over itself in this love letter to Saddam.

This article is replete with the absurd.

Number one: Who cares that Saddam grew up "lonely and impoverished"? It is irrelevant. Does that excuse the hundreds of thousands he killed? Does it make him less culpable for the deaths of men, women, and children?

Many people grow up miserable and poor and never harm anyone.

The Times was apparently appalled by the executions "unruly, mocking atmosphere ." Why does this matter at all? The seem to think that Saddam deserved to die with more dignity. Saddam received more dignity and due process than all the people in the mass graves he filled.

Here is my favorite part of the entire article:

"The leader of Mr. Hussein's Albu-Nasir tribe, Sheik Ali al-Nida, said that before flying to Baghdad on an American helicopter, he had been so fearful for his safety that he had written a will. Bizarrely, Sheik Nida and others were shown on Iraqi television collecting the coffin from the courtyard in front of Mr. Maliki's office, where it sat unceremoniously in a police pickup."

Good. It is fitting that the Butcher of Baghdad went out in this manner. He died with a whimper and not a bang, hung as the criminal he was.

His death should be unmourned. I am upset that he is even being buried. They should have loaded the body into a Blackhawk, flown it into the deep desert, and dumped it, to be covered by the sands of time.

The world is a better place for his passing. His legacy will be shame, defeat, and eternal damnation.

The NY Times should be ashamed of itself.